wisdom from 'This Is Us'
Hello dear reader,
I actually hardly watch tTV, but, when I do find a show I love, I really love it.
One of my current favourites is ‘This Is Us’. It follows a family of five, the Pearsons, through the ups and downs and reality of their life together. It’s told in current time, flash forward, and flash back. I love it more than you love it.
There was a line in one particular episode (season 2) that I heard and it really landed with me as wisdom (I mean, most episodes are full of great stuff but this was especially good).
Jack is talking to his sons.
“You’ve got to own your choices, boys. Choose them fully and don’t look back.”
Own Your Choices.
Sometimes we half-live with our choices.
We choose a life, make a decision, take a path, but keep looking over our shoulder, consider all the could-have-been lives if we had made other choices, other decisions. Wonder if we had made the right decision, should I have taken this role, married this person, moved to this city, and so on, and on.
Owning our choices, committing to them, fully, deeply, wholeheartedly enables us to avoid being passive, blaming circumstances, others, and living the life we are in.
This is about taking responsibility for our own lives.
Choose Them Fully.
I thoroughly enjoyed the concept of the film, Sliding Doors, back when it came out in 1998*
The film shows us two possible life choices, depending on whether Gwyneth’s character, Helen, catches her train or not. Catch the train, don’t catch the train. Her whole life direction seemingly pivots on that. There’s a twist of course, and I won’t say because we all hate spoilers.
I’m not sure thinking everything hinges on one decision is entirely helpful. It can causes paralysis in actual decision making, perfectionism and regret or anxiety. We have to trust the process a little more and own the decision. Choose the decision fully. Choose the life fully. Don’t hold a bit back for when you’re more sure because that doesn’t help anyone.
Choose fully the life you are leading. Of course, you can make a change, but until you make that change, choose fully.
Keeping the door open to what ifs means you don’t fully experience the what is.
Don’t look back
We talked about looking back a couple of weeks ago, and of course, it has its place. Looking back to learn, to grow, to be thankful. But in this context it’s again, about looking back rather than living the life. Looking back wondering if you made the wrong choice. Looking back, thinking about all you gave up. It’s not worth it.
You can’t go there.
Look ahead, with the life you are creating, the opportunities still ahead of you.
So, wherever you are, whatever your life looks like, listen to Jack. Own your choices. Live them fully. And don’t look back.
And if the choice was wrong, make the change. We talked about how to do that last week ☺
Have a wonderful day,