Best is better than perfect

When I was younger, there was a darts-based game show called Bullseye with Jim Bowen. If you didn’t win, instead of softening the blow with something kind, Jim would hit you with the famous line:

“Here’s what you could have won!”

The prizes weren’t even that great, but still, what’s the point of showing someone what they can’t now have?

It got me thinking about decision-making. How often do we make a choice and then spend the rest of the time imagining the alternatives? The meal we didn’t order. The job we didn’t take. The path we didn’t follow.

Instead of living fully in the decision we did make, we ruminate on what might have been. 

Now, I’m not saying we should never question our choices. Of course, it’s wise to reflect and sometimes even change direction. But there’s a difference between thoughtful reflection and the anxious second-guessing that drains our joy.

So the real question is: How do we build confidence in our decisions instead of living with constant regret or paralysis?

This came up in my podcast chat with my 19-year-old son, Jude. He admits he wrestles with what you might call “buyer’s remorse” - that immediate (or lingering) feeling that the other option might have been better. And maybe sometimes it would have been (or a whole lot worse). But often, it’s just perfectionism whispering that unless we’ve chosen flawlessly, we’ve chosen badly.

The problem? Perfectionism doesn’t just create regret, it also fuels procrastination. If every choice has to be “the perfect one,” then how can we ever move forward? The pressure is paralysing.

What if it’s simply this: make the best decision you can with the knowledge you have, live it out with commitment, and use what you learn to make even better decisions next time.

In this week’s podcast, Jude and I talk about exactly this - how perfectionism became a burden, why letting go of it has been freeing, and how to walk with confidence even when outcomes are uncertain. We also dig into beginnings and endings, friendship and community, and whether we’re ever really “ready” for the next chapter of life.

I’ll leave you with a thought that sums it up beautifully:

“I can always choose, but I ought to know that if I do not choose, I am still choosing.”
— Jean-Paul Sartre

With love,
Hannah x

P.S. I’d love to hear from you: what helps you make decisions with confidence? And how do you stop yourself from getting stuck in regret?